Let it Go!!!

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A woman walks into a bar.

“Hey.  I was here about a year ago and you had this drink on the menu with fresh blueberries.  Can you still make it?”

The bartender says, “No, I’m sorry.  We took it off the menu so we don’t have the ingredients anymore to make it.”

The woman says, “Well, I’m sure you can improvise.  Can’t you just make me something close to it?”

No.  No I cannot.  Do you want to know why?  We don’t have blueberries.  Do you want to know why?  WE TOOK THE DRINK OFF THE MENU!!!!

The bartender in real life says, “Sure.”

Folks… times change.  People change (sort of).  Restaurant menus change mostly according to product pricing and seasonal changes.  And bar menus change.  They change because you were the ONLY one who liked that drink last year with the muddled blueberries, rubbing-alcohol vodka, and fresh-squeezed overly-sweetened lemonade.  Real talk: no one likes to chew their drinks.  That’s why it’s called food AND drink.  Not food WITH drink.

If you don’t see what you want on the menu, change your expectations.  Don’t ask a bartender to recreate (or worse… improvise) a very specific drink and taste you remember from any night more than a month ago if it wasn’t the bartender that made it in the first place.  I don’t remember what I ordered for Chinese take out last week.  I’m not going to be able to recreate a drink you had a YEAR ago.  You’ll wind up not liking it, my manager will have to comp it off your check, and then I’ll be ACTUALLY snarky to you as opposed to being generally snarky to you which comes across as witty.

Take a note from the Dread Pirate Roberts: “Get used to disappointment.”

One thought on “Let it Go!!!

  1. and then I’ll be ACTUALLY snarky to as opposed to being generally snarky to you which comes across as witty.

    Quintessential Viv!!!!!!!!

    Sent from my iPhone Robert B Mintz, PhD 973.650.6563

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